18 October, 2005
(0 ) 22:35 Truthfully, the world is full of lies.
Had a splitting headache today. Sucked to the core. It's becuase I didn't have enough sleep and I know it. Geebus.
Brought the laptop to school today! How fun. It was damn heavy though, and my shoulder just about wanted to break. Had first OP rehearsal today. Was speaking too fast, as usual. I personally felt that our presentation wasn't bad though, considering that we've never rehearsed it before. Haha. Self-praise = no praise, I know, but I don't mind. ^.^ Laptops are fun. I dunno if I'm going to bring it again tomorrow, because I've now learnt that during this period, all the computers in school are used up, so if I even want to work on our group's WR at all, it'll have to be on a laptop. I'll check our timetable tomorrow to see if there are any breaks, and also how much I finish today. Then I'll decide.
I hate people. I hate people because they pick me up and make me feel good, then throw me down and break me apart. And I'm so fucking sick and tired of picking up the pieces of my own heart that I don't think I can put it back together anymore.
I hate my eyes. I hate my eyes because they see too many things I don't want to see, and pretending to be blind doesn't cut it. You don't know how many times I've tried to look away, but it's always the things that you don't want to see that draws you in. Like a black hole, sucking away my soul.
I hate my ears. I hate my ears because they hear too many happy voices that are not mine, with laughter I cannot take part in and music I can't carry a tune to.
I want to be blind, to be deaf, to be oblivious. I don't want to be around people anymore -- they take too much out of me. I want to be by myself, just like how it was in the beginning.
Screw all you happy people.
Had a splitting headache today. Sucked to the core. It's becuase I didn't have enough sleep and I know it. Geebus.
Brought the laptop to school today! How fun. It was damn heavy though, and my shoulder just about wanted to break. Had first OP rehearsal today. Was speaking too fast, as usual. I personally felt that our presentation wasn't bad though, considering that we've never rehearsed it before. Haha. Self-praise = no praise, I know, but I don't mind. ^.^ Laptops are fun. I dunno if I'm going to bring it again tomorrow, because I've now learnt that during this period, all the computers in school are used up, so if I even want to work on our group's WR at all, it'll have to be on a laptop. I'll check our timetable tomorrow to see if there are any breaks, and also how much I finish today. Then I'll decide.
I hate people. I hate people because they pick me up and make me feel good, then throw me down and break me apart. And I'm so fucking sick and tired of picking up the pieces of my own heart that I don't think I can put it back together anymore.
I hate my eyes. I hate my eyes because they see too many things I don't want to see, and pretending to be blind doesn't cut it. You don't know how many times I've tried to look away, but it's always the things that you don't want to see that draws you in. Like a black hole, sucking away my soul.
I hate my ears. I hate my ears because they hear too many happy voices that are not mine, with laughter I cannot take part in and music I can't carry a tune to.
I want to be blind, to be deaf, to be oblivious. I don't want to be around people anymore -- they take too much out of me. I want to be by myself, just like how it was in the beginning.
Screw all you happy people.